- Mysterious poop in the bathtub
- MOMMY! There’s a HUGE spider in the toilet!”
- Extreme hunger (not mine)
- Extreme thirst (not mine either)
- “MOMMY!! Claire’s about to tell on me and everything she says will be a lie!”
- Four doorbell rings and a dozen phone calls
- Extreme hunger (mine this time)
- Extreme thirst (mine, for tequila)
- Three loads of laundry
- “MOMMY! You forgot to feed us lunch.” (4:00 PM)
- Check-ins with BFF Lara Khoury Johnson (a.k.a. my sanity savers)
- Dentist anxiety from John Rudy: “Babe? What time is my appointment again? Is my dentist male or female? How do I get there?”
- Stepping in cat puke
- Kids’ Halloween candy calling my name (I told them all of their Reese cups and Kit Kats had mysteriously melted and had to be pitched)
- Damn Facebook
….and this was just from today.